Hangout Music Festival 2012: Is this real life?

Along the sunny coastline of Alabama is the best kept secret among music lovers worldwide. It’s a place where artists from across the four corners of the globe come to gather on the sandy white beaches of Gulf Shores to vibe out in the sand and get a damn good lower body workout in doing so. Hangout Music Festival’s three day long spanse of music included anything and everything: New Orleans zydeco, Rock and Roll Hall of Famers, Alabama-bred rappers, founders of electronic dance music, and blues rock guitarists all on one friendly shore.

From the second I woke up and looked outside the front windows of our condo onto West Beach Avenue, I knew this would be a special weekend. Where else do 1/3 of the festival goers casually pedal in on rusty Schwinn rentals from decades past? Where else do you get to walk out on a fluffly, white sand beach and get to listen to pop icons like Randy Newman? Where else do you get to ride a MegaDrop while listening to the Red Hot Chili Peppers jam out? Not no where, not no how.

So I didn’t get a lot of pictures and I didn’t take any video, but if you’d like to pay for me to go to these festivals, let me know because I will be taking donations starting June 1st. And instead of boring you to tears with adjectives on how awesome my weekend was, I’ll just give you a run down of the festival highlights. Starting with Friday:

- Bud Light, Miller Lite, Coors Light, Natty Light (at the same damn time)
- Sunscreen, glitter, and facepaint (though not necessarily in that order)
- Sand and sun!
- Alabama Shakes’in that azz
- Yelawolf

- OAKENFOLD
- Oakenwolf? Hmmm let’s sit down for a bit due to some time zone confusion and enjoy Wilco in the cool sand
- Waiting for STS9 with what appears to be a lost Jersey Shore juice head with neck muscles the size of a tree trunk screaming “SKRILLEX!” Uh, no broseph, this is STS9. Get your basslines correctified.
- Friendly hippie consoling me from “The Situation”
- JACK WHITE tent revival
- Walk home and lay outside raving about Jack White’s tent revival

The sun comes up Saturday and we do it all again, except with a different lineup:

- SAND! GLITTER! (sunscreen) 
- SCHEDULE CHANGESSSSSSS! SKRILLEX AT 3!
- Deep breaths
- RANDY NEWMAN (knows no limits to what he sings about and it’s fantastic)

- Skrillex starts, I miss it… again for the 3rd festival straight, but for Gary Clark, Jr. ahmahgahd.
- Sunscreen
- I haz cheezgurger
- Dr. Dog
- Kaskade’s greatest hits (but it’s been yearsss since I’ve heard “Be Still”)
- String Cheese Incident
- String Cheese Incideeeeent (and vibing)
- SH H H H H HPONGLE!!! AHMAHGAAAAHHHHHD 
- Mary Poppins Man
- CH H H H H HILI PEPPERS!!!
- Fireworks, do do doo doo do doooo
- Mary Poppins Man reprise

Sunday… and the sun’s still shining:

- We slept in and missed Big Freedia :(
- We slept in and missed Mavis Staples :((
- Finally got there to see Paper Diamond (which was surprisingly awesome- about 150% times louder and more awesome than he was at Ultra if you can believe it)
- Not to miss STEVE WINWOOD for the world
- But Steve didn’t play “Valerie” if you can believe it
- Zeds Dead and Omar Linx! (woulda, coulda, shoulda been as loud or louder than Paper Diamond)

- The Flaming Lips Part 1: The Hits, with friends, then alone, then with friends again
- The Flaming Lips Part 1: Dark Side of the Moon with about 10,000 friends
- Dave Matthews plays, but we choose to lay in the hammock grove instead
- Dave Matthews continues to play, but we choose to eat 10 pounds of ground beef nachos instead

And there you have it, folks. Hangout Music Festival 2012 was a complete success and a complete joy to be a part of. Despite missing Skrillex and despite missing the ladies of the century, Mavis Staples and Big Freedia, I had one of the best weekends ever, and got a killer tan to boot. Check out the rest of my pictures over on my Facebook page and don’t be shy, LIKE ME!

Next stop, Las Vegas…